求大学英语短剧

大学英语搞笑短剧~

Scene II

(Blue Sky Hospital-Emergency)

(Ambulance sends them to the hospital)

Nurse: Who is injured?

(Both of them say it is themselves at the same time...)

Nurse: What's your name, Mr.?

Mr. Green: Call me DPP Green.

Nurse: (Unhappy facial expression) Oh! Go to the corner and sit there.

Mr. Green: But ... (nurse interrupts)

Nurse: Go! Don't speak any words.....what's your name, Miss?

Miss Blue: My name is KMT Blue.

Nurse: (gentle and smiles) Oh, Miss this side, please. Would you tell me how you are feeling?

Miss Blue: Oh! I ache all over...

Nurse: OK! I'll help you stop the pain first, and then the doctor will treat you in a while.

(Mr. Green comes over to require medical treatment, but rejected)

Mr. Green: Nurse, I...I feel...

Nurse: Wait there, didn't you hear me?

(Mr. Green goes back helplessly, the doctor comes over at this moment...)

Nurse: The young lady called KMT Blue...KMT Blue.

Doctor: Ok! I see... How are you, Miss?

Miss Blue: I got an car accident and I ache all over...

Doctor: (Check) It's ok...don't worry about it. I'll give you some medicine. You'll get well soon......

Miss Blue: Thank you, doctor..

(Miss Blue leaves.)

Doctor: Next one. (Mr. Green comes in and Dr. reads his medical record) You are called DPP Green!

Mr. Green: Yeah! Any problem with that ?

Doctor: Hmm...(Consider) DPP Green (Raise up voice)? What's wrong with you?

Mr. Green: I ache all over-headache, toothache and foot ache (The doctor interrupts him impatiently) ...

Doctor: I... I... I see, Miss Lin – give Mr. Green an injection...

Mr. Green: What? An injection?

(Nurse takes out the syringe)

Nurse: Where do you want to inject?

(Mr. Green is frightened and shivering ...)

Mr. Green: Well, doctor ...that ...I do not ache anymore, I...I want to leave.

Nurse: Wait! Don't go...

(Nurse pulls Mr. Green and forces him to enter the injection room)

Mr. Green: Wow! ...... That hurts!

(Miss Blue goes out of the emergency room, but Mr. Green leaves in terrible pain.)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scene III

(Taiwan House)

(Both of them come back home, then open the door and go into the house at the same time...)

Daughter: Dad ...Mom ...What happened to both of you? Dad, you look pale. Mom, you look terrible, too.

Mr. Green: I would not be like this if not for your mother...

Miss Blue: What! That is your father's fault and he blames me impudently for...

(Daughter is cold and shrugs–then watching TV)

Daughter: Oh! I understand it. Even since the Presidential Election, there's no peace in our home.

(Both of them are still quarrelling ....)

傲慢与偏见

Elizabeth Bennet: I thought you were in London.

伊丽莎白：我原以为你在伦敦。

Mr. Darcy: No... No. I''m not.

达西：不...不，我不在那。

Jane Bennet: Yes. A thousand times yes.

简：是的，一千次说是的。

Caroline Bingley: I can''t help thinking that at some point someone is going to produce a piglet and we''ll all have to chase it.

卡罗琳：我忍不住不去想在某个地方某人也许会弄出一直小猪来，我们都必须去追逐它。

Caroline Bingley: Goodness, did you walk here Miss Bennet?

卡罗琳：谢天谢地，你是在这儿散步吗本尼特小姐？

Elizabeth Bennet: I did.

伊丽莎白：是的。

Caroline Bingley: Charles. You cannot be serious.

卡罗琳：查尔斯。你不能这么严肃。

Jane Bennet: He is just what a young man ought to be.

简：他只是一个年轻人通常会这么做的。

Charlotte Lucas: Mr. Collins and I are engaged.

夏洛特：科林斯先生和我订婚了。

Elizabeth Bennet: Engaged?

伊丽莎白：订婚？

Charlotte Lucas: Yes.

夏洛特：是的。

Elizabeth Bennet: To be married?

伊丽莎白：就要结婚了？

Charlotte Lucas: Yes, Lizzie, what other kind of engaged is there? Oh, for heaven''s sake, Lizzie, don''t look at me like that. There is no earthly reason why I shouldn''t be as happy with him as any other.

夏洛特：是的，丽滋，难道还有别的订婚吗？哦，老天保佑，丽滋，不要那样看着我。并没有任何世俗的理由，为什么我不能和别人一样和他在一起幸福。

Elizabeth Bennet: But he''s ridiculous.

伊丽莎白：但是他很可笑。

Charlotte Lucas: Oh hush.

夏洛特：哦闭嘴。

Mr. Darcy: I love you. Most ardently. Please do me the honor of accepting my hand.

达西先生：我爱你。最热烈地。请接受我的手。

Elizabeth Bennet: Sir, I appreciate the struggle you have been through, and I am very sorry to have caused you pain. Believe me, it was unconsciously done.

伊丽莎白：先生，我很欣赏你经历过的挣扎，并且我很抱歉引起你的伤痛。相信我，这些都是无意而为的。

Mr. Darcy: Is this your reply?

达西先生：这就是你的回答？

Elizabeth Bennet: Yes, sir.

伊丽莎白：是的，先生。

Mr. Darcy: Are you... are you laughing at me?

达西先生：你是...你是在嘲笑我吗？

Elizabeth Bennet: No.

伊丽莎白：不。

Mr. Darcy: Are you *rejecting* me?

达西先生：你是在拒绝我吗？

Elizabeth Bennet: I''m sure that the feelings which, as you''ve told me have hindered your regard, will help you in overcoming it.

伊丽莎白：我很相信这种感觉，当你告诉我有碍于你的尊重，这会帮助你克服过去的。

Mr. Darcy: Might I ask why, with so little endeavor at civility, I am thus repulsed?

达西先生：我可以问为什么吗，礼貌性地戴着一点点努力，我因而就被拒绝了？

Elizabeth Bennet: And I might as well enquire why, with so evident a design of insulting me, you chose to tell me that you liked me against your better judgment.

伊丽莎白：并且我可能也想知道为什么，这对我是如此明显的一个侮辱，你选择是告诉我你喜欢我还是反对你自己更好的决定吧。

A Story of Affinity, Love, and Faithfulness

Introducer[五位演员一起登场，由一位讲解员进行介绍.]
Hello, everybody here. This is a story about Diao-chan.
Now I want to introduce all the characters for you.
The first role is Diao-chan, the female hero in this play.
This is Wang-yun, Diao-chan’s father. And our lovely soldier.
A brutish man, Dong-zhuo. The last is the greatest fighter
in our
story, Lyu-bu, General Lyu.
Now let’s begin our story.
[演员、讲解员回到幕后]

(Curtain up)
[幕拉开，灯光不开，同时我们的Storyteller 开始道来]
Storyteller: Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls，now come along and enjoy
my show. Today I’m going to tell you a story-- A story about Diao-chan, a
marvelous beauty; a story about love; a story about hate, and a story
about loyalty and betrayal.
[说到这里，幕已全开。然后后灯打开，从观众角度来看可以看到黑色
的人影]
Some 1500 years ago, it was the last regime of the Han Dynasty. At a quiet
late midnight, Wang-yun, the Prime Minister of the time, was worrying
about the future of his country.
Act 1
地点：王允家
人物：王允，貂禅
SCENE 前灯打开，观众角度可以看到舞台上的一切。音乐响起，伴随着《三国演义》的主题歌，王允在来回踱着步哀叹。
Wang-yun: 心理独白 Now those ambitious courtiers started to scramble for
power, profit and influence.
Wang-yun: But there’s nothing I can do because of Dong-zhou’s
adopted son, Lyu-bu. He is the greatest fighter ever since
and will protect his father! Oh my lord, what am I going to do?
(说完王很心痛得走，貂禅出现，双手合十，默默祈祷）
Diao-chan: (Sigh) [My lord, please help my father out.
[王允听到了声音,循声而去. ]
Diao-chan: since I was three my father Wang-yun had treated
me just like his own daughter! It’s time for me to repay
his kindness. And, and…
Wang-yun: (王允走了一圈，发现貂）What are you doing ,my dear?
Diao-chan: Well… I have an idea about how to kill Dong-zhou.
Wang-yun: Oh, That’s great! But……
Diao-chan: But Daddy, that is the only way!
Wang-yun: But……
Diao-chan: [Diao-chan nods her head, with a firm and determined expression
on her face.] Don't worry! Just trust me.
Dad. Let’s get the whole thing started.
Wang-yun：[深深吐了一口气，缓缓地道出]O---K
(灯光暗后复亮，表示场景的转换)
Act 2
地点：王允家
人物：王允，貂蝉，吕布，董卓，士兵
Storyteller: And according to Diao-chan’s plan, Wang-yun has invited both
Lyu-bu and Dong-zhou separately to his house.
SCENE 灯光亮起。At Wang-yun’s home. A wooden Chinese table is set in the middle
of the stage; some Chinese wine pots and
small wine cups are on it. Also, two wooden chairs are placed
next to it. Wang-yun talking to the servant with anxious
Wang-yun: What time is it?
Wang-yun: It 's time for his coming. Have a look!
Servant: Yes sir. Oh, Sir, General Lyu is at the door.
Wang-yun: Hurry, my dear. Lyu-bu is already here.
Diao-chan: Don’t worry about me. Let me go inside and prepare myself, OK?
[She walks in.]
[她进去了。同时，响起butterfly乐曲，貂跳起了跳舞毯,
作为热身准备的交代。]
Wang-yun: [To the servant] Let him in.
servant: Yes, sir. [The servant goes out and leads Lyu-bu in]
Wang-yun : [觉得BUTTERFLY的声音太响，不堪忍受回头说了句]Oh,
My dear, turn down a bit.
[音乐转轻至停止]
Lyu-bu: [Walk towards Wang-yun and hug him] Long time no see, Mr. Wang.
How have you been these days?
Wang-yun: Fine, thank you. Please take a seat. In fact,
the main reason why I invited you today is that my daughter, Diao-chan,
has been an admirer of you long time ago.
She would really love to see her hero. I was wondering weather you would
like to meet her?
Lyu-bu: Definitely! I’m delighted to do so.
Wang-yun: Diao-chan, Diao-chan…
Diao-chan: [Walks out from the painted screen.
Using her sleeves to cover her face,
pretending to be shy.] Yes, Daddy.
[Diao-chan 以一个漂亮地步子走上前，看到Lyu-bu 害羞地低下头。
王允开始介绍]
Wang-yun: This is my daughter, Diao-chan.
And this is General Lu, the greatest fighter in the world!
Diao-chan: [Putting her sleeves down.] Nice to meet you, General! I’ve
admired you for a long time, a man full of
power and grandeur!
Lyu-bu: [Shocked by her beauty.] Uh…Wang-yun,
this is your…your daughter? Of course,
you see. How lovely she is! And how deep I am in love
with her just at the first sight!
Diao-chan: [躲到父亲的身后] Thank you for your compliment, General Lu.
Wang-yun: Lyu-bu, since you are in love with Diao-chan,
then I now betroth my daughter to you! What do you think?
Lyu-bu: [心不在焉]Pardon?
Wang-yun: Marry.
Lyu-bu: (激动万分)Oh,Really? That would be my greatest
pleasure! Thank you so much! I will go and prepare
for the wedding,
and will be back soon!
[He looks at Diao-chan and reluctantly left from the right.]
[吕布回去，王允和貂禅对话]
Wang-yun: [Making sure that Lyu-bu has left, looking very relieve.] Thanks
God that things are going fine!
Diao-chan: [Smiles at her father.] Yeah…So far so good!
Wang-yun: But dear, I can’t stop worrying about you.
Here you are. In case you are in dangerous.
[给刀子]
Diao-chan: [突然听到有人来了]Hush…I heard someone coming.
I shall stay behind the painted screen right now.
[She walked behind the screen.]
Soldier: His highness Dong-zhou enters
[Dong-zhou 抬着头。傲慢地走进来。王允被吓倒地]
Wang-yun: Welcome! Welcome! Almighty Mr.
Dong! It’s my greatest honor to invite you to my humble
house! Please come in and take a seat.
Dong-zhou: No. This is my name card.
Please call me Dr.Richard Dong. I have graduated in School
of Business and Economic in ECUST，received Doctor degree
[拿出毕业文凭，大笑]
Wang-yun: Oh…yes! So great! By the way, Mr. Dong,
my daughter Diao-chan would like to perform a dance for you. What do you
think?
Dong-zhou: Sure! Why not!
[Diao-chan跳舞而出，响起‘至少还有你’，然后演貂禅的演员跳起一段民族舞蹈，相信可以让大家心旷神怡。]
[舞罢]
Dong-zhou: [Applauds happily] Charming! Absolutely charming!
Diao-chan: Thank you, Mr. Dong. I am glad that you enjoy my performance.
[迎上，董卓赠于她一块玉佩]
Thank you. You have always been a hero in my heart.
Dong-zhou: [Very glad] Really? Come here!
[Diao-chan approaches him and Dong-zhou gives her a closer look.]
Dong-zhou: You are such a beauty, my dear.
Wang-yun: Do you really think so? What if I dedicate her to
you as a token of our respect? I believe that it must be her
dream to be at your side and to serve you.
Dong-zhou: Wonderful! [Turns to the soldiers] Soldiers take
Diao-chan back to my residence and provide her whatever she needs. Her
beauty deserves all the best! [倒上桂林三花酒]
[Turns to Wang-yun] Cheers! For your beautiful daughter!
Wang-yun: Cheers!
[Diao-chan walks away with the soldiers while Dong-zhou and
Wang-yun keep chatting and drinking.]
(灯光暗后复亮，表示场景的转换。背景道具变化，表示场景的较大变化)
Act3
地点：董卓安置貂禅的别院
人物：吕布，士兵，貂禅，董卓
Storyteller: Filling himself with anger and fury, Lyu-bu goes directly to
his father’s residence, searching for Diao-chan.
灯光亮起
SCENE At Dong-zhou’s residence.
A huge pavilion is at the right of the stage,
with a horizontal inscribed board saying “Dong’s Pavilion”
hanging on it. Around the pavilion are some plants and
Chinese garden settings. A soldier stands at the right
of the stage. Diao-chan sits in the pavilion,
reading peacefully.
[Lyu-bu rushes out of the stage.]
Soldier: Sorry, General Lu. Miss Diao is now in the garden.
No one can go in to disturb her. It is Mr. Dong’s order.
Lyu-bu: Get out of my way! I need to see Diao-chan!
[拿出一包银子]
Soldier: Ok.[吕布进]
[士兵走到一旁满足的笑笑。吕布气势汹汹冲到貂房里。貂哭]
Lyu-bu： My dear. Don’t cry. Tell me. What had your father
done to you?
Diao : He forced me to stay here with him. A soldier is
always out there to prevent me from escaping.
[吕布愤怒的看看士兵，走上前，一推]
士兵[倒地]：ahh. You have destroyed me.
Lyu-bu: shut! [拿出了又一包银子给他]
Soldier： I must see my doctor at once.[走开]
貂[哭着]：I know that he is your father, and I know that I shouldn’t tell you
about his terrible acts. But ……
Lyu-bu [火冒三丈]：It’s all right. Don’t blame yourself. In fact I never know that man whom I called father is
such a brutal animal!
Dong-zhou已在身后，冷笑：Who is such a brutal animal?!
Lyu-bu退后三步
(灯光渐渐变暗直到看不见为止. Lyu-bu walks out slowly from the right of the stage,
灯光只打在他身上)
Lyu-bu：（心里） [Looking troubled, with a sword on his hand]
To be or not to be, that is always the question. On one side,
it is my own father, but the other, my dearest lady.
(响起“左右为难”高潮段音乐，“一边是友情，一边是爱情”) Oh, Lord! What should I do? Dong-zhou is so
brutal and heartless, but he is my father after all! I can’t kill him.
[Puts down the sword] But, what about Diao-chan? I can’t live without her!
She is so helpless under Dong-zhou’s control.
I must save her. Yes, I must save her, despite of anything!
[He draws out the sword again]
(灯光全部打开，照亮整个舞台)
Lyu-bu: Father, I want Diao-chan back.
Dong-zhou: No way. She belongs to me.
Lyu-bu: But I love her! I want her to be with me, despite
of anything!
Dong-zhou: Never. She is mine!
Lyu-bu: [Charges Dong-zhou with the sword] Then, this is
what you deserve![刀刺向董卓]
Dong-zhou: What are you doing, my son? Don’t be foolish…
Auh…(Be killed by Lyu-bu.)
Lyu-bu: [His hands shaking] I…I have killed my own father!
I have killed my own father. …What have I done?
[ 他重重地蹲了下去，垂头丧气。灯光变得很昏暗，
只有追光灯打在他身上]
Diao-chan： General Lyu.
[Lyu-bu听到Diao-chan的声音，突然抬起头。]
Diao-chan： Let’s go. Leave away from here.
Lyu[沉思片刻,使他从伤感中走了出来]: Yes, my dear.
[Lyu-bu走到Dong-zhuo跟前重重地踢上一脚，然后和Diao-chan
慢慢地小步离去，
舞台上剩下Dong-zhuo的尸体和Lyu-bu & Diao-chan 的背影。
Introducer (背景音乐起)：After Dong Zhou’s death,
the turbulent
country had restored into a peaceful lank.
Diao Chan, the matchless beauty, the plain slave-girl.
She sacrificed her own happiness for the best of her country.
And gained her position in the Man-controlled era.
Today, we still remember the love story of Lyubu and Diao-Chan,
not for its sincerity, its heartbreak effect. But for its
concern with the future of the country .We extol Diao-Chan ,
noras much she was one of the 4-beauties of Ancient China as
she was a real heroine.
The end

ppt的话，你要自己找图片，有几个场景，就找几张，ppt 只能起到换场景作用
重点是音乐，把音乐找好，就可以事半功倍
然后插入到ppt中，设置好播放时间即可。找个ppt能力不错的，很容易

三打白骨精

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