帮忙写篇英语作文!写得好的追加分~
2008年北京奥运会是中国人的大事,吉祥物“福娃”更是深受海内外人士的喜爱。假使你是北京奥运会的志愿者,请你向外国客人介绍吉祥物“福娃”。
【写作内容】
福娃的意义:2008年奥运会吉祥物向世界各地的人民传递友谊、和平和美好祝愿
贝贝:图案是鱼,代表繁荣。
晶晶:图案是熊猫,代表欢乐。
欢欢:图案是圣火,代表运动的热情。
迎迎:图案是藏羚羊,代表健康。
妮妮:图案是燕子,代表好运。
五个福娃的名字连在一起:代表“北京欢迎你”
【写作要求】
1.使用五个句子介绍全部内容。
2.将五个句子组织成连贯的短文。
参考词汇:福娃Friendlies ;吉祥物Mascots;繁荣prosperity;藏羚羊antelope;燕子swallow
:“送礼物——给谁——为什么送——(礼物)带给对方的影响——自己的感受”,这些是这篇开放类作文的主线。不过,需要注意的是,若是礼物已送出,行文用过去时;若打算送出,还未送,则用将来时。再就是把简单的故事写得不落俗套,需要考生好好构思。
考场作文:
It was my grandfather's birthday last Sunday and he received a lot of gifts, including one from me:a fine small pocket radio. When I handed the gift to my grandfather, he was delighted and praised me for my beautiful gift.
My parents, uncles and uncles are busy every day and they can’t accompany my grandpa, so I suppose he must be very lonely. With this radio,he can listen to the news, novels and health programs for old people to kill the time. Not only can he have a lot more fun but he can increase his knowledge as well. What’s more, it will benefit his health and spirit. There will be more smile on his face.
I feel it a great pleasure that I can do something for my grandfather.
(130 words)
文章点评:这篇考场作文用通顺流畅的语言,介绍了自己给爷爷送生日礼物的经过,故事完整,情节合理。特别值得表扬的是,作者没有写朋友之间互送礼物,而是写自己给爷爷精心选择的故事,突出了“尊敬老人、体贴老人”这一中华民族的传统美德,应该说选材比较新颖。
文章在介绍自己给爷爷买a fine small pocket radio的原因时,下笔墨很多,说明作者是个有心人、细心人,读来让人动容。相信作者的这份爱心、孝心也能触动阅卷老师的心灵,为自己博得理想的作文分数。
另外,作者在遣词造句方面也颇有讲究,delighted;accompany; suppose;lonely; kill the time;benefit his health and spirit;as well等词和短语运用得也很有水平。
以“礼物”为主题写一篇作文。该文章必须包括以下内容:
1.你送礼物的对象及所送的礼物;
2.该礼物对他(她)可能产生的影响或带来的变化。
考生作文与评析
(A)
As it is universally acknowledged that presents may convey friendship and precious feelings, I have an idea in my mind that a unique gift should be sent to my intimate friend who will leave for the U.S. A in August.
To begin with, the present consists of two parts--one photo album and a letter. As she opens the album, the season of happiness and the period of sorrow that we shared will be unfolded, thus locking the days into her permanent memory. When she misses her homeland and her friends, this
album may act as the most effective medicine on her homesickness. As for the letter, I hope that it may give her power and courage when she is depressed. So I will write in the letter that “There is no way to happiness, happiness is the way. Complete darkness may endure for a night, but it
will never overcome the radiant light of the morning. ”
On the whole, the present bears my sincere wishes and it will become an everlasting symbol of our friendship.
能根据题目要求,明确送礼的对象及所送的礼物,并且非常具体、生动地描述了礼物可能对她产生的影响。全文结构完整,表达流畅,所用词句不仅正确性较高,还展示出很强的遣词造句能力,是一篇很好的作文。
(B)
My best friend, Jack, he is a sportman. Because he loves sports, so his score is always bad. I want to help him, so I have been ready for giving him a present. It is a notebook about many valuable things.
First, I hope it is useful for him. His score will progress. But I'm sure he will read it every night. Because I am his best friend. I hope he will get a good score in next text.
Then, I hope he can spend less time playing sports. Or he will have no time to study, his score will never be better.
The last, I hope us will be forever best friends. And I will help him, but I really hope my present will let him get a good score.
虽然也按题目要求说明了送礼物的对象及所送礼物,但是在表达礼物可能对他产生的影响时,明显地缺乏应有的语言表达能力,只能反复使用同样的词语和句型,读上去十分单调。作文中有较多的语法、拼写及标点符号错误,虽然基本上不影响对文章的理解,但文章的表现力大打折扣。
有啥问题找我O(∩_∩)O哈!
所有生物都要依靠太阳的光和热而生存。植物需要光和热才能生长,它们接受阳光制造食物。我们无法自行制造食物,但植物可以。我们所吃的所有食物都来自食物链中的植物,而其源头则是太阳。动物也需要阳光。就象我们一样,动物也是食物链中的一环,而食物链正是起源于植物和太阳。
First way:By bus,need to chang bus,and need to walk stretch.
Second way:Take taxi ,the price is dear.
My advice:I think take a taxi is better than by bus.Because buses are always crowded.Although take taxi is expensive,it's comfortable.And you can also have a nap in the taxi.Good luck to you!
乘公交汽车,须转车,还须走一段路程; 乘出租车,费时,价钱贵;
起价100
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