急需一则英语搞笑故事，5分钟左右的

急需一则英语搞笑故事，5分钟左右的~

The Rabbit And The Turtle (龟兔赛跑)

One day, a turtle is climbing. A rabbit sees the turtle. It asks the turtle: “Hi, turtle. What are you doing?” “I’m running.” The turtle says. “Haha, you are running? How slowly! Let’s have a race. Let’s see who runs fast.” The rabbit laughs at the turtle. “OK.i believe i will beat you” The turtle says.
The next day is a sunny day. The turtle and the rabbit are ready for a game. Many animals are watching. “Three ! Two! One! Start!” monkey says. The rabbit and the turtle runs to the end. The rabbit runs very fast. The turtle is climbing with aslow but steady pace to the goal. It’s behind the rabbit. The rabbit runs to a tree. It sees the turtle is behind. It thinks: “The turtle is very slow. I can sleep under the tree.” So the rabbit was found a comfortable place,lie down and fell fast alseep.
The turtle climbs to the tree. It sees the rabbit is dleeping and doesn’t stop. In the end it gets to the end and is very happy! Now the rabbit wakes up. It thinks the turtle is still behind. The rabbit runs to the end. when ihe rabbit reached the end.It sees the turtle there. “Haha, I win!” the turtle says. The rabbit is very sad. It is crying.
This story tells us: we can’t be pride.

有一天，俺商店里来了个外国人买西餐料。他选好一样东西，俺就在计算器上摁出价钱给他看。当然俺有点不好意思了，而且俺还会句英语。
于是，俺就对他说：

“I am sorry”。
“I am sorry，too”外国人回答。
“I am sorry three”我道。
“What are you sorry for?”外国人问。
“I am sorry five”我说……

Three Little Pigs 三只小猪
Storyteller: There are three little pigs living with 讲故事者：三只小猪和他们的妈妈
their mother. Ding-Ding and Dong- 住在一起。丁丁和东东
Dong are brother pigs. They are very 是猪哥哥，他们很懒，他
Lazy. They eat and sleep all day. 们整天吃了就睡。龙龙是
Long-Long is the youngest pig. She 最小的，她整天帮着妈妈
works all day. She helps her mother 做家务。
to do the housework.
Mother pig: You have grown up. You must make 猪妈妈：你们已经长大了，你们得
your own houses. 为自己盖间房。
Goodbye, little pigs. Build a house. 再见，孩子们。去盖间房。
Be careful of the wolf. 小心狼。
Pigs: Yes, Mum. Goodbye. 三只小猪：好的，妈妈。再见。
Wolf: I’m hungry. Look! Three little pigs 狼：我饿了。看，三只小猪可
for dinner. Mmm. 以做我的美餐。
Sister pig: What are you doing, brothers? 猪妹妹：哥哥，你们在干什么？
Ding-Ding: I’m building a house with leaves. 丁丁：我在用树叶盖房子。
Dong-Dong: I’m building a house with sticks. 东东：我在用树枝盖房子。
Sister pig: But leaves aren’t strong. 猪妹妹：可是树叶不牢固。树枝也不
And sticks aren’t strong. 牢固。
Brother pigs: Yes, we know. But it’s easy. 猪哥哥：我们知道。但它很容易。
What are you doing, sister? 你在干什么？
Sister pig: I’m building a house with bricks. 猪妹妹：我在用砖头盖房子。
Brother pigs: Bricks! That’s very difficult. 猪哥哥：用砖头盖，那太难了。
Sister pig: I know. But bricks are strong. 猪妹妹：我知道，可是砖头很坚固。
……
Brother pigs: Oh, we’re finished. Let’s have 猪哥哥：噢，我们盖好了。我们打
a nap. 个盹吧。
Sister pig: My house is finished. My house 猪妹妹：我的房子盖好了，我的房
is strong. 很坚固。
Wolf: Little pigs. Little pigs. Open your 狼： 小猪，小猪，快开门！
Doors!
Brother pigs: No. No. Go away. 猪哥哥：不开，不开。快走开。
Wolf: This is very easy. Sticks and leaves 狼：这太容易了。树枝和树叶
aren’t strong. 都不牢固。
Storyteller: The wolf blows the houses down. 讲故事者：狼吹倒了房屋。丁丁和东
Ding-Ding and Dong-Dong run 东跑到龙龙家。
to Long-Long’s house.
Brother pigs: Help! Help! 猪哥哥：救命! 救命!
Wolf: Stop, you two pigs. 狼： 站住，你这两只小猪。
Brother pigs: Open the door, sister. The wolf 猪哥哥：妹妹，快开门。狼来了，
is coming. Let me in. 让我们进去。
Long-Long: Come in, please. Don’t worry. 龙龙：快进来。别担心，我的
My house is strong. 房子很坚固。
Wolf: Where did they go? Oh they are 狼：他们跑哪儿了？噢，他们
Here. Little pigs. Little pigs. Open 在这儿。小猪，快把门打
the door! 开。
Three pigs: No. No. Go away. You bad wolf. 三只小猪：不开，不开。快走开。
你这只恶狼。
Wolf: I’ll blow it down. 狼：我要吹倒它。
Storyteller: The wolf blows and blows. He 讲故事者：狼吹呀吹，它不停地吹。
blows and blows. But the house 可是房子非常坚固。
is very strong.
Wolf: I’ll hit it. Oh. 狼：我要撞倒它。噢！
Long-Long: Let’s boil the water. 龙龙：我们把水烧开。
Brother pigs: OK. 猪哥哥：好的。
Wolf: Oh, oh! It’s hot. It’s hot. 狼：噢！噢！好烫，好烫。
Three pigs: Hooray! The wolf is dead. The 三只小猪：好啊！狼死了，狼死了。
wolf is dead
Storyteller: Since then, Ding-Ding and Dong- 讲故事者：从那以后，丁丁、东东
Dong work hard with Long-Long. 和龙龙一起努力工作。
They work and play together. 他们一起工作，一起玩。

问题补充：最好差不多一分钟，不要太少！！ I'm Trying to Stop It "Boy, why have you got cotton-wool in your ear? Is it infected?"

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