麻烦高人看看我这篇短文有多少语法错误，结构错误，用词错误。麻烦改详细些，我会加分的。

高手帮我看看这篇英语文章有多少语法错误、结构错误以及用词错误~

A glance at the table provided【The table provided】 reveals that per【each/every】 person travelled average【of】 distance【distances】 and used mode of travel between 1985 and 2000 in Britain.

One particularly interesting fact highlighted by the figure【figures，肯定不是一个数字，应是一组数字，用复数】 is that to use【using此处用动名词】 car【cars】 is the most distance of all modes【词句你要表达什么意思？】 between 1985 and 2000 that respectively were 3199 miles (M) and 4806 M.【between 1985 and 2000,3199 meles (M) and 4806M respectively.数字直接做壮语，respectively一般用于它修饰的词后】 And the car travelled distance【复数。可数名词，要么复数要么前面有a、an，不能自己就出来了】 how increase is the most prominence【词句意思表达不清】. To changed【to 后面接动词原形】 scope were the taxi travelled distanced【词句句式语法不对，不清楚你的表达】 and there were increase more than 3 times how it ascend sharply from 13 M in 1985 to 42 M in 2000【and there was a sharp increase from 13 M in 1985 to 42 M in 2000】. Per person【Individuals】 were【去掉were】 travelled by train rise【2000是过去时，用动词过去式】 slowly from 289 M in 1985 to 366 M in 2000. And 【the number of因为你后面说的是数字变化，主谓要对应】other model【复数】 were【去掉were】 used by English people grow gradual【用副词gradually】 from 450 M to 585 M.

Walking covered the distance to be decline how it decrease【有it，动词用第三人称单数decreases】 steady【副词steadily】 from 255 M to 237 M. Bicycle can be travelled distance how it sink【sinks】 dramatically from 429 M to 274 M【how用的不对，没有图表，不知道你要描述什么】. In all model【复数models，有all】, local bus【同样，可数名词不能自己出来，buses】 travelled distance to be【去掉to be】 descend【descends】 【that were the prominence that decline exponentially 去掉】【此处加个逗号】from 429 to 155 M. according【according to固定搭配】 this table, we can find that the vehicle【复数vehicles】 cover【covering】 the distance increase【increased】 rapidly from 4740 M in 1985 to 6475 in 2000.

All in all, it is very clearly witnessed【此词去掉，多余】 that in Britain, the people 【直接用Britan people】used model【复数】 of travel what their changed information and average distance were distance by these model of travel【这句不知你要表达什么】.


In sum， 有3点主要错误重复出现，造成意思表达不清：
1、时态错误。是2000年的情况就要用过去式。
2、单复数使用错误。注意可数名词的使用，加s或前加冠词a/an/the。
3、一句话里经常出现多个谓语，造成表达不清。真理，一个句子只能有一个谓语，状语可以多。

最后，能写出这篇文章，楼主肯定是下了功夫的，有语法的错误，但总的感觉写的很正式，不口语化，这点很好。好好练练语法，只要用心，就会不断进步，不要急，打好基础。基础就是语法。

改过的中文：
在提供的表格上，信息一目了然，它揭示人曾使用的旅游模式，改变从1985年至2000年在英国的旅游模式。
这是显而易见的，从信息，每人要使用的各种车辆已行驶在英格兰的平均距离显而易见。1985年是3199英里，开车的人声称数目激增至2000年的4806英里。排名第二的火车已被用于由286英里到366英里。为了解决已被用于长途巴士已行驶距离如何迅速增加的问题，大约两个尖齿从54英里，124英里。在英国，出租车已被驱赶的距离如何增加范围到从最小13英里最多为42英里。其他的模型都已被用于从450英里到585英里。
相比之下，三个旅游模式已下降到必须通畅，步行，自行车和局部总线。为了有座位的地方，车已行驶距离它是如何从429英里急剧下降，到124英里。自行车已经沉没的范围约为百分之八，1985年255英里。总之，从1985到2000年，英国人曾使用过的所有车型行驶距离有所增加。
最后，根据这个表，我们可以知道什么是改变了英国人各种车辆从1985年至2000年旅行的距离信息。
改过的英文：
In the form provided, the information at a glance, it reveals people's travel patterns have been used to change from 1985 to 2000 in the UK travel patterns.
This is evident from the information you want to use a variety of vehicles per person has been driving in England the average distance is obvious. 1985, is 3,199 miles, driving the proliferation of people claiming to 2000, to 4,806 miles. Second train has been used by the 286 miles to 366 miles. In order to solve the long-distance buses have been used for the rapid increase in driving distance to the problem, about 54 miles from the two sharp teeth, 124 miles. In the UK, the taxi had been expelled from how to increase the range to 13 miles from the minimum up to 42 miles. Other models have been used from 450 miles to 585 miles.
In contrast, the three tourism model has been dropped to be smooth, walking, cycling and local bus. In order to place a seat, the car has been driving distance and how it has drastically declined from 429 miles to 124 miles. Bike has sunk about eight per cent range, 255 miles in 1985. In short, from 1985 to 2000, the British model had used all of the increase in driving distance.
Finally, according to this table, we can know what is to change the British variety of vehicles from 1985 to 2000 travel distance information.

前面的我是在原文基础上改的，括号的是需要修正的。后面太乱了，就直接改了。你对照一下原文就知道了。
Glance at the graph provided （which) (原句里有glance,show两个动词，语法上错误，加上which，把它变成了从句）
shows(主语graph是单数） the demand for electricity in England during typical days in winter and summer. The pie chart (concerns with) （整句句子里没有动词，所以把concern作为动词，concern with sth.是固定搭配）
the information of (electricity that used in English families.)（这个词组表达错误,英国家庭一般用English families）

According to the graph, we can see clearly that (in winter) （句子较长时，时间状语放前面比较符合英语表达方式）(the consumption of electricity in English families is larger（数量用large,不用high) than that in summer ) (in winter always above 30,000). Electricity consumption fluctuates during 0:00 to 12:00. The consumption of electricity （电力消耗用这个词组表达）at 2:00 is about 40,000. At 9:00, it drops to 30,000. However, （前后句意思反差较大，加个转折连词表达更通顺）the number rises slowly from 38,000 to 41,000 in the afternoon.（在下午，介词用in,in the afternoon) In the evening, the electricity consumption reaches the maximum in the whole day.(一整天中,这是固定表达） It soars rapidly from 41,000 to 45,000 during 19:00 to 23:00. At 0:00 ,（在一整天中的最后一小时，就是0：00）it plunges(主语单数） down to 35,000.

Let's （没有 let we这个说法）look at the second curve of this graph. It indicates（单数） the information of the consumption of electricity of English familie in summer. It differs（different是形容词，它的动词是differ) from that of the winter. It doesn't change greatly （表达程度的副词用greatly) in one day.
The electricity consumption usually waves between 12,000 and 18,000, but at the 9:00 it drops (下降至，用drop比较好）to 12,000 and at 13:00 ,it reach the highest point of （具体数值用0f表达）20,000.

The pie chart illustrates(单数） the amount of eletricity that used by different electrical equipments. （电力使用分布，根据上下文的意思来看，应该是指不同电器使用的电力，所以这样改）We find that the eletricity used （使用在烧水和供暖系统的电力占到。。。所以主语应该是使用的电力，）in heating rooms and water occupy 52.5 percents of the total consumption. Radio and TV consums 15 percents, which is the same amount that vacuum cleaners and food mixers used.（这个就是吸尘器和food mixers消耗电的比例与radio,TV是相同的都是15%） The remainders are shared by the ovens, kettles and washing machine. （剩余的是复数，动词用share比较恰当）

In conclusion, （总之，比all in all要更地道）according to these picture, we can find the information of eletricity used in English families and kinds of electrical equipments that used in winter and summer.

(Glance at删去 )The graph （provided删去）shows the demand for electricity in England during typical days in winter and summer. The pie chart shows the used electricity information of English families（改为此句） .

According to the graph, we can see clearly that English families（同上）consume more electricity in winter than in summer （改为此句）(in winter always above 30,000). Electricity consumption fluctuates between（during改为between） 0hrs to 12hrs. Englise families that use electricity of 2hrs reach 40,000,and for 9hrs, it drops to 30,000.(根据楼主的文义，改为此句) The consumption of electricity rises(加s) slowly from 38,000 to 41,000 in the afternoon. At night, the electricity consumption is the maximum of the day（in all day改为of the day）. It soars rapidly from 41,000 to 45,000 between（during改为between） 19hrs and 23hrs. An ultimate one clock in all day ,it plunge dramatically down 35,000.

Let we look at the second curve of this graph. It indicates（加s） （that多余的，删去）the information of the electricity consumption of English families in summer. It is（加上is）different from that of（加上that of）the winter’s curve, it doesn't have a great change during the day(改为此句).The electricity consumption always waves（加s） between the 12,000 and 18,000, but at the 9hrs it reaches（加上es）the bottom of（at改为of） 12,000 and at the 13hrs it reaches the highest point of（同时） 20,000.

The pie chart also（加上also） illustrates（加s） the type of the electricity consumption（加上consumption )。We find that heating room and water occupy 52.5 precent(去掉s). Radio and TV consumption is 15 precent（同时）. So are vacuum cleaners and food mixers(我想表达:吸尘器和food mixers消耗电的比例与radio,TV是相同的都是15%,). Remaind改为The rest consumption is shared by the ovens, kettles and washing machines（改为此句）.

All in all, according to the graph（these picture改为the graph与前文对应）, we can（加上can） find the English families' electricity information as well as its types in the winter and summer.

楼主的文章有点难度，但经精心修改，已基本通顺。

祝你进步！

The graph shows the demand for electricity in England during typical winter and summer days. The pie chart concerns the information of electricity used in English homes.

According to the graph, we can clearly see that during winter,the English home consumes more electricity than during summer (constantly 30,000 more consumed during summer than during winter). Electricity consumption fluctuates between 0hrs to 12hrs. Electricity used by English home at 2hrs reaches 40,000. And at 9hrs, it drops to 30,000. The consumption of electricity rises slowly from 38,000 to 41,000 during the afternoon.Maximum electricity consumption is at night. The consumption rate soars rapidly from 41,000 at 19hrs to 45,000 at 23hrs. By 0hrs it plunges dramatically down to 35,000.

Let's look at the second curve of this graph. It indicates the English home electricity consumption during summer. Different from the curve during winter, the graph remains relatively steady.
The electricity consumption constantly wavers between the 12,000 and 18,000, though at the 9hrs it reach the bottom at 12,000 and at the 13hrs it reach the highest point at 20,000.

The pie chart illustrates what the electricity is used for. We find that heating room and water occupy 52.5 pre cents of total electricity consumption, while radio and TV consumption is at 15 pre cents.Vacuum cleaners and food mixers also take up 15%.(我想表达:吸尘器和food mixers消耗电的比例与radio,TV是相同的都是15%,). The other 17.5% is shared by ovens, kettles and the washing machine.

最后那一段不明白用意

主要是修饰词有点不会用，during,at等。还有很多是词组问题。有些地方两个词颠倒一下就可以

All in all, according to these picture, we find that the English home use electricity information and type of consumption between winter and summer.

See my comments in brackets and I revised it to tell a better story of your project: (Bob)

Glance at the graph provided show(s) the demand for electricity in England during typical days in winter and summer. The pie chart concerning the information of English home used electricity.

According to the graph, we can see clearly that English home in winter consume(s) electricity high than summer (the winter always (uses) above 30,000). Electricity consumption fluctuates during 0hrs to 12hrs. Electricity used by English home at 2:00 (pm) hrs (with) reaching 40,000. And at 9:00 (pm), it drop to 30,000. The consumption of electricity rise(s) slowly from 38,000 to 41,000 (in the) afternoon. At night, the electricity consumption is the maximum in all day. It soars rapidly from 41,000 to 45,000 during (7:00 pm.) and 11:00 pm. An ultimate one clock in all day ,it plunge dramatically down 35,000 (presumably most people have gone asleep then) .

Let('s) look at the second curve of this graph. It indicate(s) that the information of the English home consumes electricity in summer. It (is) different from the winter’s curve, it has no huge change in all day in winter time.
The electricity consumption always varies between the 12,000 and 18,000, but at the 7:00 pm it reach the bottom at 12,000 and at the 1:00 pm it reach the highest point at 20,000.

The pie chart illustrates the type of the electricity, we find that heating room and water occupy 52.5 pre cents. Radio and TV consumption is 15 precent, which is the same as the comsumption of the vaccum and food mixers. (我想表达:吸尘器和food mixers消耗电的比例与radio,TV是相同的都是15%,). Remainder consumption is from the ovens, kettles and washing machine.

All in all, according to these pictures, we find that the English home usage of electricity information and type of consumption between winter and summer are different.

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萍乡市15276381468： 麻烦高人看看我这篇短文有多少语法错误,结构错误,用词错误.麻烦改详细些,我会加分的.Glance at the graph provided show the demand for electricity in ... - ？
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